the abyss before me

monitor all aglow. the sharp angles of the plasterboard walls to the right and to the left. slipping around the back towards the input channel, i slither down the arrow stamp into the wind, passed the socket exhange system. i can see the motherload stretched out across the darkened technorizon. dust pockets abound in the corners and above. the exterior hum now becomes a piercing, suffocation agent of sonic terror. my work can not be completed. i exit in haste and the florescents attack my senses until i crumble to the linoleum. there i lie amongst the scholastic morning may lay and the discarded tools of the trade. noone to notice, my doom is eminent. only now can i enjoy myself, in the peace and the solitude of this desperate moment of lingering life. the tackle truck rumbles by outside, the foreigners are busy communicating with their punch pads and the all night vendors are retiring their wagons. the time whirls around like a speeding recycling truck in the early am hours. wasted and sweaty from my self inflicted delirium, i wander through the vacant halls of my mind. the linoleum wraps itself around my thinning torso. strecthed out and abandoned, i grasp for the lone source of nutrition, a meaningless and meager morsel. in one fell swoop, i injest what appears to be a dried and damaged walnut. i am content. the sweat subsides and i fill with a warmth, a complete sense of wonder invades my body and my upper eyelids begin a slow motion journey towards my lower lip. i have been infected by a rotten walnut. i join the other side. i no longer exist.